November 2… The baby Crispy Crunch have all gone to a better place, and now, every teacher’s world shifts towards the dark, dark world of The Report Card.
Today I will stick my baby toe, most gingerly, into the iciness that is reporting, and begin to get my mind into euphemism-mode and education-speak. Yuck.
In the spirit of nonsense and using the most confusing words possible to say something that no one else really understands, I present:
Gobblegooky – by Jon Scieszka
‘Twas frustose, and the vitamins
Did zinc and dye (red #8).
All poly were the thiamins,
And the carbohydrate.
Beware the Gobblegook, my son!
The flavorings, the added C!
Beware the serving size, and shun
The dreaded BHT.
And as in folic thought I stood,
The Gobblegook, with eyes nitrate,
Came gluten through the dextrose wood,
Its extracts carbonate…
For the rest of this lovely silliness, find Science Verse by Jon Scieszka, with illustrations by his buddy Lane Smith. Naturally, this book is every teacher’s best friend. The kiddies whoop it up every time I insert one of Scieszka’s hilarious poems into a science period. I must admit, the boys are particular fans.
Mr. Scieszka has a super-clever website (but of course). Go there: Jon Scieszka Worldwide. You will find much to amuse and inspire.
Science Verse is published by Viking.